


Touch and Go

by orphan_account



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Anal Sex, Anxiety, Depression, F/M, M/M, Not a lot of it bc i am vanilla af but yeah some sexy sexy times, PTSD, Self-Doubt, Sex, Stucky Big Bang 2016, Violence, War Vet!AU, War Veteran Bucky Barnes, War Veteran Steve Rogers, War Veteran!AU, little bit of Coffee Shop!AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-12 00:11:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7912885
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I've killed people."<br/>"So have I."<br/>"But did you enjoy it?"</p><p>(In other words, Bucky doesn't know what to do in a relationship besides sabotage it)</p><p>for the Stucky Big Bang 2016!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Touch and Go

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a mess. But hey, at least yall got a fic out of it. SOooooo, yeah.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy it.
> 
> And a HUGE thanks so much to my artist for this Stucky Big Bang, buckmebxrnes because they did THE best art for this ever and I am so thankful! (art is here: http://buckmebxrnes-art.tumblr.com/post/149681749649/art-for-the-stucky-big-bang-based-on )

Bucky Barnes is an amputee. He can still feel the pain sometimes. His arm burning and stinging, even though it’s gone. He can still feel the weight of his jacket on his arm. It’s not a memory, it’s a  _ feeling _ . Sometimes he wakes up, and he’s so sure, completely and utterly sure that it’s back. And then his delusion falls apart when he realizes no, it can’t be back, his life can never go back.

Natasha, his roommate, tells him all the time that he shouldn’t be such a whiney bitch. Bucky would agree, but she has both her arms.

She can find a normal job - she works at a law firm, but if she didn’t, she could be bagging groceries, being a barista. She can walk down the street without everyone staring at her, without kids pointing at her stump of an arm, without people looking away when she catches their eye. No, she’s pretty and smart and has both of her arms.

Bucky doesn’t resent Natasha, not at all. She’s his best friend and is one of the only people he trusts wholeheartedly. But there’s always been some kind of bitterness in their relationship. Natasha would never understand what being handicapped is like.

Bucky works at a local bookstore. The owner’s name is Scott and they’ve seen each other a total of four times since Bucky’s interview. Scott is an ex-con and is surprisingly funny. He also gives Bucky the graveyard shift, at Bucky’s request. He goes to the shop at five-thirty in the morning to set up, and opens it at six, then he works till nine, when another employee - Daisy, he thinks her name is - comes to take over. He doesn’t make a lot, but he doesn’t need to. Natasha was loaded, and paid for rent in full before Bucky even had the chance to chip in.

Their apartment itself is regular sized, two bedrooms, one and a half baths, and a really nice kitchen. There wasn’t much else, besides the forty inch tv that adorned their west wall, their apartment wasn’t very extravagant. They did, though, have a slamming movie collection. All of the best movies from the last hundred years and they have them. And all the bad ones too. Every first saturday of the month they liked to have a bad movie marathon and watch a bunch of terrible movie in a row.

 

The first time Natasha tries to set Bucky up on a date is a Friday in November. It’s sort of chilly and the trees are bare and Bucky’s hair is long again. Bucky gets back from work at almost nine thirty, and his nose is red from the cold. Natasha starts to talk about her friend and Bucky doesn’t really care. Natasha has a lot of friends that she talks about.

“She’s free next friday,” she says, bumping his shoulder.

Bucky freezes, “Nope.”

Natasha pouts, her lower lip curling, and her eyes enlarging. She’s very good at the puppy dog face, and it’s very annoying, “Pwease!” She even says it in a childish tone, sounding as if she’s about to cry.

Bucky sighs, “Natasha-”

“Pwease, Bucky?” Her tone is so sweet that Bucky thinks he might get a cavity just from hearing her.

He still says no.

She bugs him for days about it. “She’s nice!” Natasha tries, over and over, to get Bucky to go on a date with a Maria Hand? Hilt? Hill? Something like that.

“I’m sure she is, Nat,” Bucky says, “But I’m not.”

Natasha rolls her eyes before giving Bucky her ‘or-else’ look. Bucky is used to Natasha setting him up on dates; it’s happened too many times during the year and a half they lived together.

Bucky goes on the date, and finds out Maria Hill is smart, funny, and a quick thinker. Bucky instantly decides that he likes her. Maybe not as a potential romantic partner, but as a person. 

Their waiter, an obviously high-school-aged kid, makes lewd jokes at Maria (“My names Brian, you should hear my number” or “Love the dress, it would look better on my floor.”). Bucky wants to hit him. If his mother taught him anything, it was to be respectful to women (and people in general).

“Wow, your eyes are beautiful-” Bucky is about to cut him off, tell him to stop being such a disrespectful shit and apologize to Maria. Maria talks first.

“They are. I have wonderful eyes,” She smiles, and it’s a sickly sweet that Bucky never wants to be on the receiving end of, “I also have your cell phone-” she pulls it out of her purse, “- and I can see here that your girlfriend is very nice. She sent you a red heart emoji and said ‘have fun at work sweets’. You wouldn’t want me to call her and tell her about how you’ve been hitting on a twenty-seven year old for the past hour?”

The boy is completely red, and the amount of fear in the boy’s eyes almost makes Bucky pity him. But then again, he was just making gross innuendos at a woman who is way too old for his pubescent ass.

“Please don’t.” The boy says, “I’m sorry.”

Maria looks like she’s thinking for a moment, “And? Will you ever do this again? Because I do, in fact, know where you work.”

The boy shakes his head, “I’ll stop.”

She smiles and hands him back his phone.

Bucky is in complete awe of Maria. The amount of power she had over the boy in just a few words is amazing and scary.

The rest of the date they talk, Bucky tells her about his love of movies, and how he loves swimming. She tells him about the coffee place that she lives by that makes terrible coffee but the best scones. He also learns that she’s not really into guys that much, and just got out of a relationship. She went on this date to stop Natasha from bugging her about it. Bucky agrees, telling her Natasha forced him into the date as well. They exchange numbers and text each other memes.

The next time, it’s early January, and  _ he’s loaded, Buck _ .

“So, you want me to go on a date with a rich guy for his money?”

Natasha winks, “Not just the money, babe. That’s not the only thing he has a lot of.” Bucky laughs, and goes on the date.

His name is Tony Stark (how Natasha knows Tony Stark is a mystery within itself) and he’s rich as fuck. They go to one of the nicest restaurants in New York. The food is great, and so is the company. Turns out they have a lot in common. Including both topping, and being unable to compromise. Bucky gives Tony his number, and says that if he ever wants to hang out and talk about movies, just call.

Bucky goes home disappointed and full of one of the best meals he’s certain he will have ever had in his entire life. And, about seven thousand dollars. Tony was sorry the date didn’t end well.

After that, it takes seven months for Natasha to find someone she thinks Bucky might actually like.

This time, he was in the army, his name is Steve, and is one of the nicest people Natasha knows. So self sacrificing. Bucky wants to say  _ no, no thanks Nat, I love being lonely _ ! But god, does Bucky need a good fuck.

They meet at a little cafe near Central Park.

Bucky is told the man is tall - taller than Bucky, who himself is already taller than the average man - and blond and huge. Natasha tells him that he will know the man when he walks in.

( _ What do you mean huge? _ Bucky asks Natasha.  _ His muscles have muscles, _ she replies.)

Bucky doesn’t see the man when he walks into the cafe fifteen minutes early. The place isn’t busy - they had planned to meet at 2 o’clock, a time when the cafe had fallen into a lull. The only other person is a college student immersed in her textbook.

At three minutes to two, a man walks in. And Bucky is absolutely floored.

This man is something else. Yes, he’s tall and blond and huge, but Natasha failed to mention that this man could probably win People’s Sexiest Man Alive.

Steve, Bucky remembers his name, waves at Bucky. Bucky isn’t exactly sure when the man noticed him,  but he waves back.

Steve starts to walk over, and Bucky notices the way his muscles are aggressively outlined in his shirt.

“Hi, I’m Steve,” he introduces himself, taking the chair across from Bucky, “but I’m sure you already know that. You must be James.”

Bucky smiles at the man, “Yeah, but please, call me Bucky.”

Steve nods, before vaguely gesturing to the cafe, “Have you ordered anything yet?”

“No, I was waiting for you,” Bucky ducks his head, blushing in the slightest, “What do you want?”

“I’ll have coffee. But with as much cream and sugar as you can put in. I hate the taste of coffee, but back in Iraq, it was one of the only drinks we had.”

Bucky laughs, “If it makes you feel any better, I always get tea. I think coffee is just disgusting.”

Steve smiles at the comment, “I thought I was the only one.”

“Nah,” Bucky vaguely waves his hand, “I think everyone hates coffee but is just too stubborn to admit it.”

“Well, I better be glad you’re not stubborn.”

“I’m stubborn on the things I care about. And coffee is  _ not _ one of them.”

Steve smiles, before making a move to get up, “I’ll order.”

Bucky wants to stop him, but before he can, Steve interrupts him, “ _ I’ll order. _ ”

It’s a command, and Bucky stays put.

Their first date doesn’t go below the surface;  _ What’s your favorite color, Bucky? _ and  _ You have any pets? _ and even  _ How long were you stationed?  _ But they’re both okay with that, and for once actually enjoy talking about something that isn’t  _ heavy _ .

They both want to walk the other home, but in the end, Steve wins out, walking Bucky to his apartment, and even going inside to make sure Bucky made it home safely.

They don’t kiss, but Bucky’s lips touch Steve’s cheek. Steve ducks his head, and blushes like a madman. Bucky can’t help but think it’s cute.

“Text me, please.” Steve asks him, and Bucky nods.


End file.
